BREAKING NEWS:
The country went into a Code-Red security alert this evening when a low flying aircraft flew within 3 miles of the White House.
"Norad went into high-alert status. We were -this close- to pushing the button, launching a fullscale nuclear offensive to rid the sky of a potential Taliban insurgent."
So why didn't you?
"An emergency cat-scan of the White House and surrounding buildings showed that no one was home. We would've wasted a nuclear missile."
Ok, thanks for the update. So when do I get my new national I.D. card. To prevent this sort of stuff?