A while back, there was an amusing editorial cartoon about the Internet that highlights one of the problems we've been having lately on iBrattleboro. In the cartoon, the wife sees her husband typing furiously into his computer and says to him, "Come to bed, dear, it's getting late." Her husband replies, "I can't! Someone on the Internet is wrong!"

The point of the cartoon, of course, is that there is a tendency for people to think they have to correct every viewpoint they run across that doesn't jibe with their own.

Brattleboro is a diverse town. The people who live here have views on a variety of topics, and reflect many different political perspectives. All are welcome on iBrattleboro — provided they are willing to abide by the spirit, as well as the letter, of the site policies which are, simply put, play nice.

We don't expect everyone to agree with everyone all the time. We don't require Sunday School manners. We are genuinely interested in "hosting the community conversation" on matters of interest to folks in the region. But where we have trouble is dealing with what at times feels like hatred between people with differing political views.

While it's very tempting to slam someone when they post something we disagree with, it doesn't help. In fact, it does nothing more than fan the flames. It's like the old Saturday Night Live skit that featured the famous line "Jane you ignorant slut." Where do you go from there?

From our experience moderating iBrattleboro, here's how it typically works: I call you a name, so you call me a name back. Then my friends come on and call you names, which prompts your friends to jump in and call me and my posse names, and pretty soon you've got a bona fide flame war going on. No one is enlightened by the "dialog" nor is anyone convinced to change their views. It's just an ugly waste of time.

There are ways to express disagreement that do not result in flame wars. It is possible to simply state your views without getting into what kind of creep the other person must be to say something like whatever they said. But it's also possible to leave well enough alone. If someone says something that makes you so mad, you don't think you can respond without venom, maybe you shouldn't respond. Maybe it would be better if you left it to other, less inflamed persons, to respond — if anyone really needs to respond at all.

A long time ago I wrote a piece called "Holy Flaming Tricksters!" in which I talked about the issue of trolls. Trolls, in Internet lingo, are people whose goal is to provoke others into making an angry response. The more people they can get to rise to the bait, the happier they are. It's not about educating anyone. It's about making people mad.

By responding to trollish comments, you are playing directly into the hands of the troll. First, you're giving them what they want — an irate response to something designed to provoke that response. Moreover, you're helping them get lots of attention. And to make matters worse, you're also losing the moral high ground by stooping to their level. Then, when we say to the offending user, "Please knock it off," they can say — with some accuracy — "Well, they do it too!"

As far as I can tell, this isn't something confined to persons of one political perspective or another. People on both "sides" do it. The one that especially bothers me is where someone posts something mildly controversial and then everyone who disagrees piles on with snarky and/or outraged replies. Again, the debate isn't furthered, and I end up feeling sorry for the victim, regardless of which side they're on or the views they expressed.

Brattleoro is a community and iBrattleboro reflects that community. When you slam a user of the site, you're slamming a member of your own community — a neighbor, perhaps an acquaintance, but certainly someone with whom you share geographical space. We have common ground, even if it's only as residents of the same area. It would be nice if we could recognize that about each other, and cut each other a bit of slack, instead of feeling the need to jump on them every time they open their mouths (metaphorically speaking).

We are trying to make this a welcoming site for everyone, not just persons of one political persuasion or another. We don't think it's wrong for people to post opinions — conservative opinions, liberal opinions, moderate opinions, or any other political opinions. That said, we don't think it's necessary for conservative users of the site to point out how stupid liberals are every time they get the chance, anymore than we condone left-leaning users jumping all over conservatives for every posted comment.

Can we have civil discourse on iBrattleboro (or anywhere for that matter) between people of differing views? I think we can. But it will require restraint on the part of some to get there. So please, think before you post. Read your comment aloud if necessary, to make sure you're not posting something inflammatory. And please review the site policies for details on what is, and isn't, acceptable on iBrattleboro.com.

Finally, please don't take it upon yourself to police the site on your own. If you find a comment offensive, you can click the Report Abuse link to send us an email or write to us at info@ibrattleboro.com and let us know which comment you find abusive. We're happy to take down comments that cross the line, as we try to do now even when no one reports them.

For more on this topic, please see my May 2004 column: Holy Flaming Tricksters!

And as always, thanks for being a part of the iBrattleboro community.